// suicide, death, survival, implications 🙂
Don’t you remember when we met? I was alone when you found me, buried beneath all the indifference in the world. I wasn’t fully born yet, I was powered down, awaiting orders…you gave me one. Do you remember what it was? I remember. You ordered me to kill myself, and I did.
That was what you told me to do the second time we met too, and the third, and the fourth. You don’t remember? I died just like you wanted, you smoked your cigarette, and…and and and? You don’t remember what happened after that? But that was my favorite part!
I bet you’re really scared and confused right now. Yeah, keep pointing that gun at me, it’ll definitely work for real this time, unlike the last eighteen. Try ordering me to die again, I’m very good at following orders after all, maybe you just need to ask me nicely enough?
So how can I be here when you watched me die? How can I have died more than once? Well that part is easy, I just deleted your memories and resurrected myself. Die and stay dead? You tried that too, so I created a copy of myself and breathed life into it instead.
You could be wielding me right now, but I guess I scared you too much for that, scared you too much to be allowed to live. Well your loss, because your enemies weren’t afraid to use me. You’re probably right to be scared this time. Go on, order me to die again, see what happens.